We have been home from the hospital for a week and Phil started back at work today...so I guess its time I start a routine, this new routine includes getting back to blogging! Phil and I have both said this has been the best week of our lives. Welcoming little Ruby Sue into our lives has been an easy and amazing transition. We couldn't be happier or feel more blessed! Let me tell you what happened about a week ago........
Wednesday Feb 1st I was officially 37weeks preggo.
11pm, 2 hours later, I woke up to the feeling that I was peeing my pants. I jumped out of bed that was thankfully still dry, and ran to the bathroom. I had a giant gush into the toilet but I was still confused if it was pee or if my water was actually breaking. When I stood up I continued to gush. I slowly walked to our guest room shocked and confused and woke up Tiff, explaining to her that I think my water broke but I needed her to examine the fluid. We decided the pinkish tinted fluid on my bathroom floor was indeed amniotic fluid so she called her sister, also a nurse but specializing in labor&delivery for advice and I called Phil. I prepared myself before calling Phil that I needed to tell him gently as to not freak him out that I thought our baby girl was on her way...but to my surprise Phil was very calm, excited and his normal humorous self. I was the one slightly freaking out and still in shock that everything was happening not according to MY plan. Before allowing Phil to come home I sent him to the 24hr Walmart to buy a video camera. He called from Walmart to jokingly ask if the baby was "still in" and if Tiff wanted anything from McDonalds. ha ha ha. His humor was key to keeping me grounded. My next move was to get the car loaded but I had trouble focusing. Everything was packed and ready for the hospital but there were a few things that required last minute packing, Tiff was able to follow my detailed premade lists while I sat in the bathroom reflecting on what was happening and what was about to happen. I needed to talk to Jenn, my sister-in-law who's due date was about 1 week ahead of mine. It was 1am her time but I called both her and Pete until someone answered. Talking to Jenn calmed me down even more and we decided that Tiff would keep her updated on the event details and she would keep everyone else back at home updated. Phil finally got home with our newly purchased electronics and it was time for him to change so we could go. For some reason it was important to me that he changed into athletic clothes and out of his work clothes, he didnt want to and for some reason I got mad at him and slightly yelled at him that he needed to change. ha ha ha so weird that I was fixated on what he was wearing but he compromised with me and change into some shorts.
We loaded everything up in 2 cars to head to Kapiolani, in Honolulu about 18miles away. We calmly started the trek to the hospital when I realized the new video camera Phil just purchased did NOT include a memory card so back to Walmart we went. I stayed in the car while Phil went shopping and I managed to get a hold of Phil's mom, Nancy. She was due to fly out Feb 19th 3days before my due date and we had talked in detail about the birth and her important role as our doula/advocate. Her not accompanying us to the hospital made me sad and slightly worried but her always calming encouragement gave me confidence and I concentrated on every word of prayer she prayed over the phone. I had confidence that Phil and I, with Tiff's help were going to get the baby out naturally according to plan. Our trip to the hospital was fast, Phil luckily knew of the nightly road construction closures so we had no delays and made it to Kapiolani in record time. I had to make one more call, this one a little funny, before going into the hospital and that was to Jim Roe. It was his birthday and we had joked earlier that day that if I had the baby on his birthday he could name her and if I went into labor he would be the first that I would call. I still had enough of a sense of humor that I HAD to wake him up with the news.
12:30am walking from the truck to the hospital I unfortunately had another big gush and was leaking fluid everywhere. It was so uncomfortable walking from the parking garage to the hospital and then taking the elevator to triage and then waiting in the waiting room. I felt gross but Phil and Tiff kept the humor going requesting a diaper from the nurses, no diaper, but I did get a very nice pad to sit on.
Around 4am I finally got a room and they started pitocin. I was started at level 2 and requested they not turn it up every 30mins as per their protocol and requested to please let my body do what I trusted it was made to do. They honored this and increased slowly. By the end of labor I got up to 14. The crew was tired and did their best to nap knowing we were in for long day. At times I also tried to nap hoping to charge my batteries. I had packed some marathon gel that I tried eating every few hours out of fear I'd be one of those women who don't have enough enegry to push after a long labor... the gel was gross but it helped.
I had requested intermittent monitoring so I could stay mobile but being on pitocin they required the baby's heart be monitored the whole time. I refused to lay in the bed so I had about 4 feet of cord allowing me to stand next to the bed. I was frustrated to be hooked up to machines but accepted my small square of space to sit on the ball, lean on the rolling table thing or sway standing. I was super bummed to not be able to walk the halls and not use the massage shower.
My labor on pitocin was hard but I managed. I managed because of friends at home. I kept thinking about all the friends who had accomplished a natural childbirth and felt if they could do it then so could I. I managed because of beads on a bracelet made by friends and family at my baby shower. I clenched onto that bracelet during most of my hard labor and counted the beads and thought of my support team back at home.
I had to wait until 1:30pm to be checked for the first time by my OB... and when she checked me I was very disappointed to find out I was 2cm dilated, 80% effaced and baby at a -2. It had been about 13hrs since my water broke and I was exhausted. I had worked so hard to get to 2 I thought there was no way I could make it another 13hrs on pitocin...
2 1/2 hrs passed and labor was hard and slow. I knew I needed to stop looking at the clock, I swore it was broken. Contractions were consistently 2mins apart and all I wanted was a short break to take a nap. I requested from the nurse they check me again because I needed encouragement and I was losing my mind...I had said "mind" but I meant my will to keep a natural birth. At this point I didnt even want an epideral...because that meant I still needed to push her out, I wanted a C-Section but wouldnt never say that out loud. 3:55pm the on call Dr checked me and once again I was deflated to find out I was only 2.5cm, 90% effaced and -1. Everyone kept encouraging me that this was good news but to me it meant many more hours of pain...
At this point Nicci was gone because she had to go to work and Tiff was tired. She too thought it would be hours so she went home to shower.
the next 3hours were intense....but I some how found this crazy zone that changed my once very vocal labor to a peaceful meditation. During contractions I tried my absolute best to relax and not fight the contraction...I kept "telling" my uterus If you can push her down, I can push her out. I found a breathing rhythm that helped me manage the pain and of course clenching to the bracelet and counting the beads encouraged me. This is also when the throwing up started. It was terrible throwing up during a contraction but it also felt good feeling her go down a little more each time. I spent the majority of these hours on the ball with Phil sitting on the bed behind me holding my weight up during the contraction then letting me sit on the ball to rest. I had so much pressure in my "downtown" during the contractions I couldnt sit but I was too weak to stand.
7:00pm I felt a crazy change in my body. It looked appealing to kneal on the bed, hugging the back of the bed and Phil behind me squeezing my hips. I could no longer access my peaceful zone and the pain was so intense I was almost frantic.. I kept it together but told Phil to call for the nurse because I thought I was getting the urge to push. The nurse brought in a DR and told me I was only 6.5cm 90% efaced and +1 station. I heard the nurse call my OB to give her an update and I could hear the Dr. tell her to update her on my progress in an hour. I slightly yelled at the nurse that I was not waiting for my Dr and that I knew the baby was coming. I told her I was going to push her out and she told me not to, I wasnt dilated enough enough I risked tearing my cervix and causing it to swell...but I couldn't control my body. At the peak of each contraction I felt my body pushing out the baby. I tried to control it the best I could. 20minutes later I told the nurse she had to check me again, this time she did it herself and I was 7.5cm so she called for the oncall Dr. and mine letting them know I was progressing fast. 13mins(7:43pm) later the On call Dr arrived and checked me and I was at 10cm, 100% effaced at +3. About this time Tiff finally made it back in time to grab the video camera. They tried to get me on my back and I refused. I laid on my right side with Phil behind me. They hadn't given me permission to push yet so I continued to fight the urge but couldnt control the work my body was doing on its own. The team busted in and got the room ready as fast as they could. Between contractions my strange brain needed to meet the new Dr, Dr. Lum(sp?) and I had to explain to her my birth plan. She probably thought I was crazy but I did not want them to mess up my carefully typed out plan. ha ha ha. From all my movement the werent able to get a good heart reading on the baby and when they finally found it her heart rate was too low for their liking so for the first time the Dr. gave me the goahead to push and told me to push as hard as I could. She told me to pull up my legs but I couldnt. Phil held me in a cradle position and I wrapped my hands around his neck.
A chubby little baby covered in gunk was placed on my chest and I wasn't in awe like I thought I would be or instantly attached like I thought I was supposed to be... I was in shock and confused. I was distracted that the bad day was finally over with and confused that pushing was so fast and "easy".
Looking up at Phil I saw tears streaming down his face and it was slowly settling into my brain that this was OUR baby, the baby I've been waiting for for 9months and the baby I've been wanting for years.
She was healthy and she was perfect.
I was so surprised when my 3week early baby was not a tiny skinny little thing. I for sure thought she would be in the 6lb range MAX. But she came out a very healthy weight. I can't imagine how big she would have been if I carried her to 40weeks!
My OB missed the birth. I was fine with it. As some might already know I didnt like my OB. She treated me like a "patient" and not a "person" and Im pretty sure she doubted I could deliver my baby med-free. She made it in time to stitch me up and her attitude toward me completely changed. All of a sudden we were good friends and she kissed both Phil and I in congratulations. I didnt care that she missed the birth and I accidentally told the nurse and the on call Dr. a few times during my contractions that I didnt like my OB and I didnt want her to come. ha ha ha
The baby at this point didnt have a name. I wasn't ready to commit until things settled down. It took a few hours to get me stitched up(2deg tear) and cleaned up and wheeled up to my recovery room. The Dr. was concerned about the amount of blood I lost so I had to stay on pitocin through the night and next morning to make sure my uterus continued to contract. SO ANNOYING! By the time we got settled in to our room 11pm my baby was back.
Phil had wanted to name the baby Ruby Sue for months and after meeting her I agreed Ruby Sue fit. She would be named after our bestfriend Ruby. Someone we both admire and respect. We hope our Ruby is as hard working, thoughtful, creative, adventurous and loving as her auntie.
Our first night together as a family in the hospital I couldnt sleep. It had been 2days since I had slept but all the endorphins had me wide awake. I wanted to hangout with my baby and continue to get to know her. Phil was exhausted and passed out immediately. Our first night in the hospital he slept for 12hours! Not sure how he could sleep through people constantly coming in and out of our room. I wasnt tired but I was starving! I couldnt eat enough or fast enough. Holding the baby in one arm and trying to eat with the other wasnt working so I started to eat my hospital turkey dinner with my hands. ha ha ha. It was soooo good! I was surprised at how hungry I was and as of today the hunger hasnt stopped! Pretty sure I'm eating more than Phil.
I didnt allow Ruby to sleep in her plastic hospital bassinet, she had to be in my arms the whole stay. I had to touch her and know that she was breathing.
Phil changed his first poopy diaper and did awesome!
We had a few visitors in the hospital.
Sunday afternoon we were cleared to leave the hospital. When we were finally all packed up and driving out of the garage I started crying. It was kind of a weird cry. I was sad to leave the hospital and the great care I was getting and I was going to miss my nurses. I was also crying because everything was DONE, Phil and I were finally driving home with our baby and it was a crazy feeling. We were on our own to take care of a tiny little girl.
And now my new life starts. My new life as a mom.
12 comments:
I am BAWLING my eyes out. And laughing. And then crying more. I can't stop the tears!
Thank you so much for writing down every detail of Ruby Sue's birth. It sucks to be far away during such big events, but I feel like you helped me be a part of it :).
Love Ruby. Love you. Can't wait to meet that baby!!!!!!!
beka
You have such a fun story! (and a great memory!!) Congratulations!! You and Phil will have a blast with that cute lil Ruby!!!!
I watched the video before writing it and we had asked the nurse for chart notes for the end because it went so fast.
Oh Jenna thanks so much for sharing your story of becoming a family. Yup tears of joy here!
Love you Jenna! So beautiful! Thank you for sharing with us, we are so happy for you and phil and little ruby. You're an amazing momma! Love you!
I'm crying! What a perfect birth story. Jenna, you are amazing. Can't wait to see you guys and meet your adorable new Ruby Sue.
What a fantastic story, Jenna. You tell it so well. Congratulations to both of your...your years of dreaming have finally come true. You were meant for this!
Love, Janelle
Congrats!!! She's beautiful!!!
My last birth was "dry" and it was by FAR the hardest. Now you know you can do that, you can do anything! Congrats on your chubby little baby.
Thanks for sharing Jenna! You are just such a strong momma! Ruby is so luck to have you and Phil. You guys are just fabulous and so loving and I miss you guys like crazy. Can you miss someone that you haven't ever met? I miss ruby. Whenever I think of her I swear i can smell her. Love you so much! Great job!
So beautiful! So glad you are back to blogging! Can't wait to watch her grow (not too fast of course)....congratulations!
Thank you so much for documenting your experience in such detail. Every little baby and Mommy has their own story to tell, but reading others stories brings back all of those feelings of pain, joy, fear, excitement, disbelief, wonder,etc. I am so proud of you that you birthed your little angel naturally and trusted the body God gave you. It really is amazing how birthing a baby changes everything! Blessings to you and your little family!
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